Reflections

Another year is here. The year 2010. When a new year arrives does it make you as hopeful as me? What is it about a new year? Is it the idea that we get to start again...almost anew even though really we are just putting one foot in front of the other and continuing onward on our path. For me, a new year feels like a small break in the chain, a chance to pause and think for a moment about my life, my path. This year is a big one for me. I'm turning 35 in just a few more months. The number itself gives me cause to pause, not panic necessarily but definately makes me stop and really think about my life, it's purpose and the path I'm on. The year 2009 was not the year that I was hoping it could be. When I stop to think about 2009 as a whole and how I felt in that year I would have to say the underlying emotions was definately sadness, tiredness, and a lot of self questioning on what is the purpose of life....what is the purpose of my life? It's a doozy of a question and so much easier to go back to sticking my head in the sand and just thinking about the to do lists of my day. But I'm afraid that if I don't start to really take seriously this question I'm going to wake up one day out of time and find that all I have accumulated is a lot of to do lists. Is this too serious a topic, I'm wondering now for a blog? Is it making anyone else feel too anxious? I think it shouldn't be anxiety filled but just a question to remind me to think of the whole big picture of my life too.